I miss my kids desperately this Christmas – more than I have in some time. Stef has moved to a wonderful new life in New York and I saw her at Thanksgiving but I can feel a wave of longing sweep over me just writing this.
I called my daughter-in-law Tracy on Saturday. It was a Secret Santa call so I just talked to her. Before we hung up she said “we miss you” and I practically broke down over the phone. I wanted to jump in the car right then and go see them all.
I wonder if this is how my mother feels about me.
Oh, and the “gifts just for the grand kids” idea we (my husband and I) tried to start 3 years ago after he retired and money got tighter, has gone by completely by the wayside for me this year. It started with giving gifts to my daughter’s cats that they could “share” with her and her sweetie. Then it exploded when I made the Secret Santa call for sizes and finished the order I had saved on my laptop for Wayne and his family.
I love the holidays. I like the cards, the lights, the food, the church pageants, the gifts, the movies, all of it. I also love giving gifts so I think that 3 year old idea is so dead for me.
We will be going to my stepdaughter’s for Christmas. I will see people I love and I will have a wonderful time. It’s just that every once in a while I wish I could beam my children and grandchildren into my living room and we could have a big group hug.