We just got back from a week's vacation in Florida. We have friends we love dearly who visit us on the way to and from Vermont every year and they invited us to stay with them. When they came by last year she was on oxygen and when we got to Florida she was very fragile. Her husband is doing all the cooking and cleaning and her doctor told her while we were there that there is nothing more he can do to improve her breathing. We, and her other friends, encouraged her to get another opinion but the truth is the new doctor will probably say the same. Next spring's trip may have to be postponed indefinitely or might be made by only one.
I am very sad about this but also very happy that we took time when we did to visit them. We laughed, we ate , we watched TV - all things that she could do. She has a laptop but struggles with more than the basics so I helped her download pictures from her camera and view a video her sister sent. We helped her husband cook and run errands. She wanted a new skirt so I took pictures of some at a local store and brought them home so she could chose without depleting every bit of energy. No matter what happens we got the chance to really be there for them, even if it was just for a week.
You might think it would be too sad to spend that much time in that situation but it wasn't the case. It was a privilege to be there and it made me feel good to be able to help. I watched them together. They fussed at each other like always but every once in a while he would look at her so lovingly like he was saving up for later. In the end I think I got more than I gave.